Holding to your principles

Hello everybody! I think it's not that late to wish everybody Happy New Year.

Talking about new year, most people will never fail to ask you about your new year resolution. Hmnn.... a new year resolution. Is it a must to have a new year resolution? I think, it's up to the individual whether they should or shouldn't have one. However, I do have my own new year resolution and it actually started earlier on the first day of the Islamic calendar, the first Muharram. Today, I'm just emphasizing myself on my resolution.

So, what is my new year resolution? You really want to know? I guess, I must tell you on how I got it first.

The last two years, I was quite unhappy with my career. One of my ex-lecturer who also work in the same place now once told me that I was not performing. She said, I was not like myself. That was about a year ago and I was so upset about it. I was upset because I was already feeling unhappy with myself back then. Now, even after a year of the incidence, I'm still feeling upset with myself. I don't feel that I am me any more. The last few months, I can't think of anything that I can proud of ..... I mean from my career wise. Reflecting to what my ex-lecturer said, she was right ...... I'm just not being ME. I have to be me again.

BEING ME ....... MY OWN ME ...... Yes ! That's my new year resolution. I want to be me again. Being somebody who is very strong and firm but yet adorable (he..he.. just to feel nice about myself). Being a person who cares about lot of things, well like by many, many people. Being a person who doesn't have to hide the truth about life. Being a person who has lots of desire and enthusiasm. Just want to be my real self again.

Why? What happened? How did I changed to be NOT MYSELF.

It was actually very easy and happened without you even realized. Every each of us has our own rules in life and certain principles that you stand on. You have your own beliefs system but when we have to go against it to adapt yourself to the new environment, it will create a conflict in yourself. In the beginning, it doesn't interfere much with your life and you don't really feel the uncomfortness  or the unhappiness because you were just to busy trying to adapt yourself to your new environment. But, after a while, once you feel that you are adapted to the environment, you'll still feel something is just not right. You don't really feels that you fit into the new environment. You don't really feel happy with what you are doing.

This is what's  happening to me. It's truly my fault ...... I know. I let myself go against my principles. I'm doing something that I feel that is not right to do. I bend myself towards the wrong way. I put my beliefs behind me just because I want to adapt to my new environment. Basically, I'm just doing things for other people with how they want it without thinking or putting my side of input. I'm doing it even when I realized it is not the way it suppose to be done.

I realized now that I've made a mistake. I'm trying to correct myself and do the right things. There are lots of  your self qualities that you should maintain and keep in order to main your  real self. We shouldn't change ourselves for any people or because other people. If we need to change ...... then, change for yourself, because you want it and for the better future.

So, my friends ......... just be your good self. Believe in yourselves. Hold to your principles.

Happy New Year!